In life, it doesn't matter how you feel.
How one feels doesn't really matter or have any impact on others/somebody.
It doesn't matter - especially your feelings - given what you had done in the past - it is all past. Well it was not past when it was happening at that time, right ? Yet, it didn't matter - those feelings or those actions. Your actions or feelings were little to nothing when all somebody could feel was their feeling towards amma. Well, it didn't occur to somebody or tothe amma that - amma feeling need not have so much influence on this regard. Yet, it was always those feelings. How much ever one gave up - being true, didn't matter. Or how would have one been through all the time after certain things were brutally done?
Even if things are forgotten by tablets medicine, won't something tug the heart ? Phew the raja vazkai. kevalamana அருவருப்பான sarasari vazkai.
In life, it doesn't matter how you feel.
Even now, it didn't matter - when one expressed their true motherly and sincere feelings - ennai pethare - & the madi emotions were all result of yearnings suppressed for years. All these didnt matter to warrant even a moment to pause and think.
When nadha expressed itself, I was overwhelmed with joy. Yet not withstanding the context, I just wanted a connect regardless of consequences coz it was always stripped of me and I feel cheated coz of this. Yet, nadha was withered away and my intent was something else to agree for that. When the kanneer came during those days despite my best efforts to suppress, it was pure miss emotions that is so dear to me - pure. I don't think I have missed anybody or yearned for anybody as much.
In life, it doesn't matter how you feel.
Oh the terrible June. Despite the hall padukai and the emotional feelings of that time, what happened soon after conveys only one thing. It doesn't matter how I feel. It is not just the act but the communication with me during those times were as cold as cold could ever be. And today was 11th too. :(
அறிஞர் அண்ணா இறந்தவுடன் கலைஞர் கருணாநிதி எழுதியது -
எதையும் தாங்கும் இதயம் வேண்டுமென்றாய்
இதையும் தாங்க ஏதண்ணா எமக்கிதயம்?
நான் என்ன குரங்கு சாமியா? நெஞ்ச தொறந்து காட்றதுக்கு? கண்ணீர் சிந்தினேன், குருதி (ரத்தம்) யும் சிந்தினேன், இனிமேல் சிந்துவதற்கு ஏதுமில்லை எம்மிடம்.
இதற்காக தானே இவ்வளவு கேட்குறேன். நான் இதுவரை எதையுமே கேட்டதில்லையே.
Yet, In life, it doesn't matter how I feel, even now.
While Kannan said - கடமை செய், பலனை எதிர்பார்க்காதே, Thalaivar Rajini said -
கடமை செய், பலனை எதிர் பார்
http://www.rediff.com/news/2008/nov/06rajni.htm
Anyways, I have done my kadamai - all my actions. Is it so hard to do some action back? Even this whole action is within one's control and hands? Despite repeated asking/, anger/pleading/குத்து/எட்டி மிதி/order/helplessness - since end of june - it doesn't matter how I feel, even now. Atlanta --> Dallas itself I went long back. Is the remedy for current mess is at such a far distance? or is the distance so far in heart to do anything, to me? ஜூன் 11 & 13 போக முடிஞ்சிதே
In life, it doesn't matter how one feels.
Having always hid the way I felt or held it secondary to something else/given up all the while, the magnitude of the mess is so huge, I expressed how I feel. Yet, to realize that even this doesnt warrant any consideration/action :(
In life, it doesn't matter how one feels.
நல்லது செய்ய நெனச்சா நல்ல நேரம் எதுக்கு - நம்பிக்கை உள்ள மனசுக்கு நாலு தெசையும் கிழக்கு
